Olde School

All posts tagged Olde School

Caption Contest!

Published September 9, 2017 by admin

It’s my birthday today! And to celebrate I thought I’d have a contest on my blog and see what happens. So, here’s what I’m going to do: I’m putting up a photo of Paddlelump, and I want you to caption it. Keep it clean, and the best entry (I’ll take into account what also hits closest to his character, along with what amuses me the most), will get their choice of either Olde School or the short story collection Lost in the Shadows in Kindle form (I’d have to check on what other formats I have available). Make sure you include your email when you comment with your entry. Contest runs from now until the end of the weekend, and I’ll try to announce winner or winners on a post next week!

padd lounging

If you’re also so inclined and want to support me on this day of days, feel free to check out my books, post a review if you’ve read them, or even recommend them to a friend or your local library. Every little bit helps!

Project Pics: Paddlelump

Published September 5, 2017 by admin

So for once in my life I don’t have any columns or reviews to share – some things are scheduled, but nothing new at the moment. I did put up the new flash stories under the free reads page, updated the books page, and I’m working on getting all the other pages on this thing up to date, as well. So, let’s just get the shameless promotion out of the way:

Buy My Stuff

Okay, now that that’s done, I figured I’d show some more project pictures today, and believe it or not, they’re actually tied in with my other work.

So, when Olde School released it was in the back of my mind what I could do to get people to my table at events, or at least get their attention. I don’t really accomplish a lot by acting like a carni barker at my table, and I’m short, so in a crowd, it’s easy to be overlooked. However, I do have a special set of skills that others don’t have…

Meaning I’ve spent the bulk of my career making big giant stuff. So I figured, why not make Paddlelump Stonemonger, the main character of the book, and let him walk around handing out swag and terrifying people into coming by my table?

At the time I was juggling a lot (switching day jobs, one of my best friends was passing away, I was still doing a weekly podcast and was prepping for the first Imaginarium), but I managed to find free time for store runs (the sheer amount of times I’ve been questioned/encouraged to leave hardware stores because they think I’m trying to be funny is amazing), sewing, and building the head in my backyard. Seriously. I nearly got in a fight with a dog over that head, its success is well-earned.  Also a huge thank you to the friend who made Clyde for me because I was literally working on Padd up until the night before Imaginarium.

Because this is so close to my professional work, I’m not really going to go into huge detail, but I think from head to toe he took maybe a little over a month (because I was cramming in the work in between everything else). Since then, he’s shown up at various events in different states, and people either love Padd or flee in terror (which is pretty close to the book, so I must be doing something right). All of these shots are by my friend/editor/wrangler Robin Blankenship, who’s amazing in her own right and puts up with so very much from me.


padd and me booth

At a book fair, because I bring only the best booth babes, 


padd library


padd and clyde

Clyde also tends to make appearances, because what’s a book event without the personification of evil in a cute little bird?


padd jumping

There is a 99% chance something like this will happen as soon as my back is turned and it always freaks me out to see the photos later. Yet I was the one who ended up in urgent care that day.


padd bookshelf

Product Placement at its finest

After all this, if you’re curious about Paddlelump, Clyde, and Kingdom City, might I suggest going here for more info on the book (including buy links), as well as interviews, free shorts, and other fun stuff involving that world.







Calling readers and reviewers!

Published October 5, 2016 by admin



Hey, remember that awesome book I wrote, Olde School? It’s currently up for grabs on the Juniper Grove Book Solutions Review Library, so if you request it you can read it for free in exchange for an honest review (Don’t let Clyde influence you. Please feel free to be honest).


Maybe not this honest

I’m still plotting out what comes next, but I’m extremely proud of that title and would love the word of mouth to keep going! So if you’re a book blogger, reviewer, or a reader who’s into quirky fantasy with a touch of horror, check it out!

All the info on how to request the title can be found here!



More reviews makes my characters stop shilling for me, I swear


Calling all Readers and Reviewers!

Published September 24, 2015 by admin

There are some upcoming opportunities for readers, reviewers, bloggers, et al!

Want to read for free? Heck, want to read Olde School for free?

Seventh Star Press is looking for honest reviews for their Read to Review program. Basically, fill out a form, choose a title, read it, post your honest review, then you get to choose another title. For a full run-down of how the program works, as well as the submission form, check out the link!

But you should totally request Olde School first. Just sayin’.


Tomorrow Comes Media is looking for reviewers and tour hosts for some upcoming titles. Click the links for full synopses and tour info:

Born of Swords by Steven Shrewsbury (Sword and Sorcery)

Codename: Knight Ranger by John F Allen (Urban Fantasy)

Hellscapes vol 2 by Stephen Zimmer (Horror)

Heart of a Lion by Stephen Zimmer (Sword and Sorcery)

Guest Post: Inspiration for Losers and the Lazy by Ippick Bonecrusher

Published August 29, 2015 by admin

So, I promised I’d let some people guest post a little bit more on here, and I use the term people loosely. Since we’re talking about creativity and process off and on, I wanted to hear a little bit about how others approached things, so today we’ll be hearing about the role of inspiration.

I’m so sorry. Please think a few hundred times before even considering following his advice.


Inspiration for Losers and the Lazy

a guest post by Ippick Bonecrusher

Seems to be a rash of creative types moanin’ an’ whingin’ bout not havin’ the best idea or not gettin’ there ideas right when they go to write ’em down. While I don’ straight make a livin’ off writin’, meself, I do get hit up for advice columns when certain someones is feelin’ a might too lazy t’be doin’ their own work. I don’t get what’s so hard ’bout it all, really. All’s ye need is a decent mechanical quill and some inspiration.

But Ippick, ye ask, what if I’m sufferin’ from writer’s block or just don’t know what to do with an idea or even how to get one?

There’s yer mistake. Yer sittin’ there makin’ up excuses and waitin’ for some made-up muse creature to zap an idea into yer noggin’. I’ve met my share of otherworldly creatures and believe ye me, ye don’t want them crammin’ anything into yer head cuz’ it won’t be anything what you expect. So stop sittin’ round on yer rear like a lump and go out there and get ye an idea! Go fer a walk. Go read or talk to people. Punch someone in the face and see what they do and what colors they turn. Chase some ducks or take someone’s ice cream and really look at it. See how it makes ye feel and what the rest of the realm does when ye do somethin’ unexpected like that. Then go write about it.

People and Folk make writin’ sound like blasted hard work, but it’s all just words, ain’t it? Words strung together to get across an idea. It don’t have to be good – that’s what editors are for. Besides, Fate knows there’s always someone out there who’ll like the dumbest things, Sit ye down with some paper and mechanical quill or a laptop and pound out some words! Even if it’s just t’get ye goin’, at least it’s somethin’! ‘Sides, ye may start a new genre or end up with somethin’ all literary only arrogant smartypants think they understand.

Ye don’t even hafta try hard! Look ‘ere and I’ll show ye:

Once Upon a time there was a right brute of a mutt named Herbert. He lived in a bookmobile and wanted more than anything t’own a bookstore but he couldn’t cuz he was a dog. Since everyone knows faeries have no magic no more, he instead looked up an antique-lookin’ tome filled with mumbo jumbo and did cultic rites to the Olde Ones that no one believed in anymore, even though the smart ones know they’re still kickin’ round. He did this for three months until he was ready to run outta sacrifices and other things needed to do those weird rites like certain herbs, copper dust, bones, ice cream, mead, mutton chops, and turnips but not the rotten ones the market lays out at the end of the week. Then he went to the post office, picked up his dry cleaning, paid his rent, and performed the dark rites all orderly an’ neat, hopin’ against hope he’d finally be listened to.

Now lookit, see? Yer intrigued cuz dogs don’t have wills of their own…or do they, cuz we all know there are some sneaky animals out there. It makes ye wonder what else is goin’ on. Besides that, when I got stuck I just threw in me grocery list and errands I had to run and ye didn’t even notice cuz I did it all sneaky like!

Ye don’t have t’be lazy and wait fer inspiration, is all I’m sayin’. Just lower yer standards and write out some words, an’ it’ll all work out for the best.

ippickIppick Bonecrusher is a mean sonofadragon who resides in Kingdom City, The Land. A real estate agent by trade, he also occupies many odd jobs to make up for his poor people skills. Although this is Ippick’s first attempt at freelance writing, he is very prone to giving unsolicited advice. You can find him in Olde School, book one of The Kingdom City Chronicles, which can be found in Print, Kindle, Nook, and Kobo.


Thankfully, Ippick tends to stay in Kingdom City. Paddlelump Stonemonger likes to travel, though, and he and I both will be at Oldham County Comic Con on Sat, August 29 from 9:30-5! Come visit us at table 116!

Olde School in Preditor&Editor Reader’s Poll!

Published January 9, 2015 by admin

2014 was definitely a mixed bag for me personally, but one thing that came out of it that I’m so proud of is Olde School. So I’m surprised and pleased to find it’s been put on the 2014 Preditor & Editor Reader’s Poll in two categories – Sci-Fi/Fantasy and Young Adult! Things like this may seem annoying because the links pop up a lot and everyone is sharing them, but they’re important because they keep indie and small press titles under people’s noses. Reader awareness is so important these days in a world where new titles are flooding the market all the time. So even if you don’t vote for me, vote for your fave and share the inks in honor of these great titles and the authors who have worked their butts off to bring them to you!

Young Adult category link

Sci-Fi/Fantasy category link


CYBER MONDAY SALE: Olde School (and others) for 99 Cents!

Published December 1, 2014 by admin

All right, kiddies – no beating around the bush because we’ve got limited time here. Love books? Love your kindle? Want to stock up on titles you’ve been eyeing or feel like discovering new ones?

Then today is your day.Seventh Star Press has thirty titles on sale as Kindle Downloads for 99 cents all day today – but hurry! Once Tuesday hits, you’ll have missed your window.

If you’re curious and looking for recommendations, might I suggest Olde School for those wanting a different sort of fantasy title….


Get it for 99 cents! (Cyber Monday only)

Kingdom City has moved into the modern era. Run by a lord mayor and city council (though still under the influence of the High King of The Land), it proudly embraces a blend of progress and tradition. Trolls, ogres, and other Folk walk the streets with humans, but are more likely to be entrepreneurs than cause trouble. Princesses still want to be rescued, but they now frequent online dating services to encourage lords, royals, and politicians to win their favor. The old stories are around, but everyone knows they’re just fodder for the next movie franchise. Everyone knows there’s no such thing as magic. It’s all old superstition and harmless tradition.

Bookish, timid, and more likely to carry a laptop than a weapon, Paddlelump Stonemonger is quickly coming to wish he’d never put a toll bridge over Crescent Ravine. While his success has brought him lots of gold, it’s also brought him unwanted attention from the Lord Mayor. Adding to his frustration, Padd’s oldest friends give him a hard time when his new maid seems inept at best and conniving at worst. When a shepherd warns Paddlelump of strange noises coming from Thadd Forest, he doesn’t think much of it. Unfortunately for him, the history of his land goes back further than anyone can imagine. Before long he’ll realize that he should have paid attention to the old tales and carried a club.

Darkness threatens to overwhelm not only Paddlelump, but the entire realm. With a little luck, a strange bird, a feisty waitress, and some sturdy friends, maybe, just maybe, Padd will survive to eat another meal at Trip Trap’s diner. It’s enough to make the troll want to crawl under his bridge, if he can manage to keep it out of the clutches of greedy politicians

Curious about the other titles you could get? Then look no further – I’ve got help. Plus, if you get involved now (and check out the SSP blog for info, you could also get in on a contest to win a Kindle HDX. And don’t forget to check out all of these books that are marked down as kindle downloads for today only!


Or see the full list and information here!