You say you want a resolution…

And now that I hopefully have the Beatles’ ‘Revolution’ in your head for the rest of the day…

January is here! A new year, a new start, a new everything! I had a great New Year’s – did the shows down at the zoo to a full house. There’s nothing better than audiences that really get into what you’re doing, and when you have more than a thousand people with noisemakers…let me just tell you it’s a trip! Our last show of the night led to fireworks, and they were gorgeous. It was nice to be there with friends and a bunch of others just enjoying the colors and music on a cold winter night. Shared experiences like that are awesome, don’t you think? When people who don’t really know each other are all admiring the same thing, most likely feeling similar sentiments, it’s just beautiful.

So now on to 2012! I’m not one to buy into the end of the world drama…there are so many interpretations to things like that, and really, I don’t think it’s anyone’s place to guess or try to predict something like that. Why can’t we all just enjoy or focus on life, y’know? There’s so much to be thankful for or worry about, why add one more thing to the plate?

Besides, of course the world isn’t going to be over yet – Cthulu hasn’t yet appeared to the world masses in fatalistic dreams, so duh…(smirkity smirk smirk. I swear I’m a serious human being. Some days.)

And then there’s the other thing about January…resolutions. I know, I know, every other blogger in the entire world has already talked about this. Well, I’ll spare you: I hate them. I don’t do them. Why?

I am incredibly, ungodly hard on myself. Anyone who has ever spent any amount of time with me knows this, and those who are close friends know this VERY well. You don’t need to criticize or nitpick or overly intervention me…nine-nine percent of the time I already know and have already been attacking myself for not measuring up. It’s a bad habit and I’ve come a long way at whittling it down through meditation, self-work, and listening to those that are in my corner. But seriously, there are days I take the ‘I’m my own worst critic’ thing to impossible levels, so adding one more ‘You aren’t doing enough so NOW YOU MUST ACCOMPLISH THIS RIGHT NOW’ isn’t a good thing for me.

In fact, the last thing I need in life is more stuff on the to do list that I feel I absolutely have to accomplish to be a worthwhile person. Dude, I already am a worthwhile person! Sure, tweaking is always needed, but I like to let it happen organically.

That being said, I kind of just plan to keep moving forward: in writing, in sewing, in not being so hard on myself, in taking care of myself, in my other creative ventures. I want to continue to take more responsibility for myself and just keep progressing the best that I can. Just keep moving forward is my theme of this year. Beyond that, I know sometimes I let myself get intimidated by silly stuff (ie technology, occasionally how people see me, though I really could care less about that anymore) that prevents me from making the most of my opportunities. So this year I do want to keep pushing past the fear, and just keep trying. By keeping things loose and positive, I think I stand a chance at actually seeing myself grow and become more and more whom I’m supposed to be – which is kind of what the whole new year thing is about in the first place.



One thought on “You say you want a resolution…

  1. Everyone makes resolutions they don’t keep. There’s always something you want to change about yourself and your life, but it doesn’t always happen, at least not straight away. (my constant theme is always wanting to lose weight – I do, then it comes back again, then I lose it…eh) Some changes simply take time to take effect. As long as you’re not moving backwards, you should feel pretty good! It’s only January and you’ve already accomplished so much. Can’t imagine what else will happen for you this year, but I bet it’ll be great!

    The zoo show sounds like so much fun. Wish I could see it ^^

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