A new year, a new lot of things…and also some of the same old crud to sort through.
My apologies for taking my time getting back here. Partially I’ve been trying to catch up on some projects and upcoming deadlines, partially I just needed some down time after a breakneck schedule that started in September and just slowed down a week ago.
People who know me know I’m not big on resolutions, so I try to take things a step at a time and tweak and improve as I go. For better or worse, I’ve seen a lot of improving to do this week…but then again, I’m also very hard on myself.
I’ve been working on some pieces for different places, and I’ve had to get used to the fact that sometimes it takes me a few goes to get things right. That’s just part of the creative process, but for whatever reason it’s hit me harder than usual lately, and when coupled with rejection letters…it was just better to take a week and take a few deep breaths than try to push myself any further.
Granted, I’ve got a lot of projects on the horizon. I’m grateful for the opportunities and I know there are a lot of people who believe in me, even when there are times when I wonder why they actually believe in me.
We all have moments like this, even us creative folk. It’s hard when the vision in your head is so damn good and you either can’t put it on paper that way, or it’s just not quite what people are looking for. There’s nothing wrong with that and it’s not my fault or anyone else’s, but sometimes it still bugs me. There are also those days when it seems like you just can’t clear the pile in front of you, when you know there’s so much looming on the horizon and it becomes too easy to get intimidated than take a deep breath and tackle it one step at a time.
So I did my week of freezing and now I’m slowly, gently working my way through. I’m trying hard not to be too rough on myself and to keep to a human schedule and enjoy the time, too. Believe me, I love what I’m working on – there’s some awesome stuff coming your way, that I can tell you. But sometimes the process isn’t glamourous at all, and it only makes you wonder if you’re headed in a remotely right direction.
So like always it’s lift one foot and move it forward, putting it ahead of its mate. Just keep going, just keep trying, just keep seeing what’s going to happen. It may sound a little fatalistic, but it’s also the best way to see what’s possible – not just with projects and things outside of myself, but what’s possible within myself, too.